Chislehurst Caves (Night 1), Most Haunted REVIEW

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ANN MASSEY takes a look back at Most Haunted: Chislehurst Caves (Night 1)

Episode Title: Chislehurst Caves (Night 1)
Location: Chislehurst, Kent
Series: 10 Episode Number: 136

Review:  

Chislehurst Caves is a place I have visited both as a child and an adult and I know the tour guide pitch by heart.  Originally a mine for flint, it is a place known for Druid worship, a munitions store for the First World War, home to thousands escaping the bombing during WWII and used for everything from rock gigs to filming Doctor Who, so I couldn’t resist the opportunity to watch two episodes of Most Haunted as they took on the 22 miles of man-made tunnels.

Here’s my review of night one (you can read the review of night two here).

“Did you hear that?” is the theme running through both episodes.  One could actually start a drinking game akin to the Jack Bauer ‘damn it’ scenario.

In this one, however, it was hard to hear much of anything thanks to the banshee like screams of Yvette Fielding, historian Leslie Smith and tag along, no purpose Kathy.

If someone has the title of ‘Historian’ you would like to think they would stick to facts and documented accounts, you know – history.  Leslie Smith, however, seemed to be more focused on conjecture and folklore rather than telling us anything that actually happened.  I was little surprised therefore to discover her job titles also include actress.

Bring on the Psychic, Brian Shepherd, who, well to give you an idea just picture the most hammed up Shakespearian performance you can imagine.  Brian thinks he senses an active spirit, no wait – an energy, hang on – nothing.

Leslie tells us of a naked man found dead in the caves, thought to be a priest who ‘broke in’.  Brian senses and then sees (wait while he staggers back in horror, hand aloft in protective stance), “… someone died here, there’s a naked body, against the door”.  “Alive or dead?” asks paranormal investigator Yvette.  Other winning quotes included “I can smell paraffin”, followed by “you just walked past a load of paraffin lamps” and “I felt a breath, right in my face”, “Was it a breeze?”

After I had finished banging my head off the table, hope looms in the form of Dr. Ciaran O’Keeffe, psychologist specialising in parapsychology and forensic psychology.  While other team members were amazed at bangs and knocks echoing (in caves, imagine that?) he remains the mumbling voice of reason and holds the appearance of someone who would rather be anywhere but in those caves, and not because he is scared of ghosts.

What follows is lots of screaming, many calls of “Did you hear that?” and an Ouija board table séance that rocks and shakes until it comes apart. Team member Geoff has the most profound quote of the episode however, commenting on his first visit to the caves since he was a child. “Not a lot has changed.” No Geoff, they’re caves.

Read my review of Night Two at Chislehurst Caves here. 

Tell us what you thought of this Most Haunted episode in the comments section below.

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